effective discipline techniques

You have actually possibly seen Amy on ABC, CBS, CNN, FOX, MSNBC, Today Show, Rachel Ray or any type of variety of media networks. It certainly makes you a better person because you learn things at an early age. Your child needs rules and consequences, and perhaps acts out if there are too few or too many of them. That’s a lot like me I should say, and sometimes just the look or a stern and firm voice is enough, isn’t it? The discipline techniques you choose would depend on your child’s age, the type of behavior your child displays, your child’s temperament, and your parenting style. This is another effective discipline technique for school going kids and teenagers, where you restrict your child to a certain place, like his or her room as a way to punish him or her. Choosing Techniques How did your parents discipline you? Let’s start by first understanding the meaning of discipline. “Do not train a child to learn by force or harshness; but direct them to it by what amuses their minds, so that you may be better able to discover with accuracy the peculiar bent of the genius of each.” ~ Plato. A great book on raising children with discipline is How to Talk so kids will listen (&How to listen so kids will talk). Understand that testing limits is a natural human From the young age, if a kid develops responsibility, it will help him to take decision in a proper way. Lead your child to a chair away from toys and the play area, and explain that he or she needs to stay there till he or she calms down. There are two types of consequences – natural and logical. The Naughty Step is more likely to work if all his carers are using this technique and have agreed on House Rules and consequences. If we desire our teen to treat us with more regard, the first step is to make certain you, as the parent, are doing simply that to everyone in your life. Yes indeed, discipline isn’t only about rewards and punishment, it’s about what is acceptable and what is not. Mockery and sarcasm will not work with young kids; instead, focus on one thing at a time to get the best out of them. Sometimes I had to add the tone in my voice just a little, but it worked. Working & Effective Discipline Techniques – Best Practices ), so I don’t blame her, but yes, everything in moderation is alright, or else kids become tuned to your loud voice and will just listen to it from one ear and it will be out from the other . While disciplining my students, I learnt that a softer, emotional response towards their waywardness is more effective than harsh words or the routine punishment. My 6-year-old heard this, escaped to the other room to collect her thoughts, after that returned and also returned the stolen sticker, apologized as well as asked for forgiveness. Don’t use ineffective discipline techniques of punishment as they don’t teach the child what he or she should be doing – there are no alternatives there. I’ll share some parenting strategies I picked up from Amy McCready, a well-known parenting expert and creator of Positive Parenting Solutions. I think you’d mentioned about iRewardChart on your blog and I think it’s a great app. . I guess she also understood the “Take Away Privileges” point of this post , A lot of beautiful tips. I think at every stage of parenting there are challenges. The funny thing is, when you really dig in to the heart issues, all the surface-level “obedience” stuff resolves itself. So, set specific, realistic, and limited goals to help your child so that you and your child both succeed. Lol…I can well relate to what you meant by your Math’s teacher being like Hiter! Not sure I do agree with that. In your case, it surely made you tough but I wonder if you are the same with your boys now – as strict as your dad? That’s something I see some parents do. Thanks for stopping by and sharing your thoughts with us . For example, tell your child that he or she doesn’t clear the room – he or she will not be allowed to play for 3 days. The first time your little one does something that merits a course correction can make you wonder, What’s the best way to discipline my child? Spanking can become violent at times and harm a child – it can also cause them to fear their parents. Make your praise specific and focused on your child’s behavior. Effective Discipline Techniques. Ah…nice to know that you remember that post on what the living have to do with the dead! And what about manners? Be mindful of what you say and how you say it — not just when you are talking to your child, but when dealing with others as well. Effective discipline techniques can help to encourage your child’s trust in you. Absolutely! Right on point. Discipline teaches your child to follow rules. Hellriegel & Slocum (p. 106) discuss one of the most familiar methods of discipline, which is a … And honestly that reward, they tend to retain for a lifetime, while they tend to forget the physical rewards. , Glad you like the post, and yes, being a parent myself, I tried thinking and adding in all that I could, though I know a lot more could’ve been written on this topic , Thanks for stopping by and for sharing it – much appreciated . We called Alan 'lucky'. I guess your daughter knew mom means business and listened to you! Since we have modeled for our children exactly how to problem solve, exactly how to resolve disputes, and also even how to apologize. Effective Discipline Techniques. Like fold up towels or clothes from laundry, etc. It’s a less effective form of parenting. . About 4 months back we started a “responsibility chart” where my husband and I reward her if she did something responsible and deduct points if she did not act appropriately. Not to mention, it’s far more difficult to focus on discipline AFTER a child has done something unsatisfactory when perhaps we, the adults, are already angry. Then go ahead, what are you waiting for. Thanks for stopping by and sharing your views , WOW! When you were a child, what kind of discipline technique did your parents use? However, with time, such kinds of punishments where you hit the child are reducing. As well as a year or more from now, you won’t believe how much you have actually changed, along with the closer partnership you have with your kids. Loved and appreciated children grow up into confident individuals. Are you kind to your spouse, to your brother or sisters, to all your children, and also to the customer support rep on the phone? You need to make sure you have such a fixed place well beforehand. So, are you ready to use these techniques to discipline your child? Where, when the child is misbehaving you give them a warning and tell them this behaviour is unnectable and if they continue they will have time out, if they continue, depending on the age 0-10 years old, every minute for their age is the time they are on time out for. Now of course, there is so much more to parenting than it was in our days, isn’t it? Children are encouraged to share their feelings as well as discuss their mistakes, ideas, and problems openly. But it’s not about finding the perfect solution, rather finding effective ways that will mean something to your child. However, parents need to tell their kids what to do and what not to do so that they don’t harm themselves. I was saying no all day long until I figured out how to distract her. A child may think that it’s alright to physically hurt someone you love – they learn the wrong lesson. To get them out they had to do something for me. When they were older it was the grounding. You wrote excellent disciplined technique. More so, kids are quick to notice the change in the parents look or voice and the smart ones would change their ways, instead of the parent trying out these techniques on them. I agree with you, little ones can drive you crazy at times. She was harder on herself than I was on her. Here they are, in alphabetical order (so you won't think I'm ranking them by merit): education; expressing disapproval The most common ways of disciplining techniques used by parents may involve a time out and light punishments, and even rewards, which are most important. • Empathize with his feelings without accepting the misbehavior (“I can see that you’re truly mad since I said we couldn’t go to the park today. At school we thought of him as an incredibly 'gifted' guitarist and he's since gone on to travel the world making a very good living at what he loves to do. They also never seem to know the magic of appreciation. 10 Effective Discipline Techniques For Children. It isn’t suggested nowadays with such effective parenting techniques, which perhaps we didn’t know about earlier – nor did our parents. Objectives Most of us tend to discipline children according to the way our parents disciplined us and according to our present values. when I started blogging. You need to ask yourself whether you own behavior is teaching your child the type of things you want him or her to learn. I easily admit my mistakes and apologize. This is great information for parents, Harleena. One of the most expensive responsibilities of management is discipline. Right parenting is the most important to grow a child proper way. By citing the above explanations I only want to point that though being harsh is good at times but if you go beyond you miss the chord. In a similar way, children learn a million times more from what we do than from what we claim to believe. It does have a good impact and even kids play their part very well that way because they want to gain those points. It a break from the tension of the present moment and involves physically removing your child from a problematic situation. It does suggest you can be kind in the face of disputes. Positive reinforcement is better and more powerful than punishment or negative reinforcement. It’s not that you’re not good as a parent. I could address this with a resounding “Yes!” Or I can share a personal recollection …. Regarding using the hot or soft sauce, I would say it depends from one parent to the other. Trying out these effective discipline techniques would help there I feel, especially the ones you feel would work for her. At the end of the day, it all has to work out and so far, it has! You have done a remarkable job…I loved reading all aspects of dealing with discipline!! This is so very important when raising kids. There is no need to spank them Talk to them and communicate always! Like my mom used to give us points for each good thing we did and minus points when we didn’t or if we behaved badly. EFFECTIVE CLINICAL TEACHING METHODS Dr. Esther John,M.Sc (N), PhD Principal, Ganga College of. What I particularly love about this definition of discipline is that it’s not about reward-punishment only. I am strangely in love with withholding privileges – it seems such a measure would work great with him! Parents should have the ability to use a variety of approaches and disciplinary techniques, especially if some don’t work. Have a nice week ahead as well . In the process, my hubby Antonio joined my journey. Effective Discipline Techniques. Choose Battles Wisely . But I guess as parents we know that this is perhaps a passing phase and things will eventually settle down with them. There were never any need for anything other than a loud tone or stern look before we did what we were asked to do, and the same is what we do with our kids and it works very well. Giving them the required freedom is important, but we need to be careful and keep track of things too. My mom used to give us points, so we were always doing what we were asked for and coming to think of it, we were such good kids – totally disciplined! Children need to know when they do something bad--and when they do something good. Well, my parents used to spank the hell out of me when I was a boy – however, I know that’s not the ultimate…the creative tips you’ve shared here will sure serve as a great alternative particularly for my boy. Studies show that parents who use effective discipline techniques raise children who are well-adjusted, self-controlled, self-reliant, and positive. Let’s take a look at what you can do as a teacher or leader to help maintain discipline and management in your classroom. No, I did not control or manipulate anybody to solve the problem. Sometimes parents are rude again sometime they are very normal. This is also a less effective form of parenting. Hitting hurts, and also I will not let you do it”) … Then, move away to shield yourself if required. Yes indeed, the teenage years, as we too have gone through that phase, aren’t all that easy. Have a nice day as well . Hello Harleena ma’am, You have defined the definition of Discipline very well. I would love to hear your thoughts in the comments below. They wonder why they can get away with anything. I have realised that no one can be a perfect parent and inculcating discipline is the hardest part of parenting…you never know which strategy would backfire, though I have been a strict discipline freak…I threw up my hands many times in case of my younger child, who could defeat me…even me! I remember my sister shouting in the house ‘No TV for you both today’ to her kids especially when they failed to perform their domestic chores and that taught them a lesson. Parents feel that buying latest things for their children is their main duty. I don’t think so because things, situations, and the times have changed, and along with it, our parenting style too, isn’t it? What a nice topic to go with the week . My kids, well they’re teens now but I still call them “kids”, we have a lot of fun but they also know I have expectations and what the consequences are if they don’t follow them. I also discovered a great app called iRewardChart that rewards children for good behavior. Parents has provide good materialistic life to their kids and this thing can make them irresponsible. Small things like time-outs, grounding, or taking away their privileges for a while teaches them to know their flaws and what they need to do to better themselves. Be proactive, not reactive. Give your child a hug in the end, so that your child knows you were unhappy with the behavior, not with your child. For example, if your child doesn’t complete his or her homework in time, you might take away the privilege of watching television for the day. Discipline is the process of teaching your child what type of behavior is acceptable and what type is not acceptable. Her materials have been life-altering for more than 75,000 moms and dads around the world, and there’s no better parenting guidance you can really use every day. I taught my kids from their early years, “cooperation makes it happen.” When they behaved, we could do fun things such as go to the park or beach. I also do this to foster a compassionate relationship between parent and children. Number one took me a while to figure out when I was raising my daughter. One of the boys who had become immune to beating, sarcasm and all kinds of punishments had tears in his eyes when I spoke to him in a softer tone and gave him the chance to explain his side. For example, if a child deliberately breaks a toy or loses it, the toy is no longer there to play with. Sometimes you simply don’t know what to do or simply if you are doing the right thing or not. And you’re surely not alone in your quest. Positive parenting is NOT: • Allowing your kids to do whatever they want, • Providing your children every little thing they ask for Effective Discipline Techniques, • Sheltering your kids from what will certainly be required of them in “the real world”. Really, you don’t have to spank or punish children to discipline them! Of course, you don’t have to be harsh and really punish them any other way, that’s not right. Effective discipline involves clear communication where appropriate behaviors and inappropriate behaviors are made clear as are consequences. I have seen very polite children and some very rude ones, it looks like its down to parenting. Though I am a teenager and neither I have to do anything with parenting as of now nor I face such restrictions now. So, become a better parent and encourage your kids more. Some visitors might be curious about my spouse, Antonio, and also his 2 teen sons from a previous relationship. Children are too delicate to be handled brutally (I feel) and should be dealt with care! Lol…yes, sometimes parents in those times used that method too, and just one of that kind of discipline method was good enough to teach us a lesson, isn’t it? It’s our work to make our kids more civilized so they become caring, loving, and responsible adults. . A little off and on light spank is alright I think, sometimes you need that if kids get out of hand, but not the real spanking, slapping, hitting or other such things are good. Thanks for the amazing post. Rather than fighting a losing fight by ordering a 2-year-old to time-out for hitting you on the arm, you can acknowledge that: • Toddlers have little self-discipline to start with, • Anger is a secondary feeling – that means there is always a key feeling below it, • The majority of mad children are really scared and/or very sad. Parents need to consider the age and developmental levels of their child while disciplining them. No one is perfect, and it’s unrealistic to expect your child to be well behaved always. Discipline does not mean “to punish.”. In many cultures, parents have historically had the right to spank their children when appropriate. Thanks for stopping by and sharing your experiences with us. It’s about getting along as a team and working together, and when one person doesn’t do her part, then everyone feels it. But jokes apart, I know you’d manage it all well being the organized person you are. It should not be mixed up with bribing a child, which is given beforehand to motivate your child to do things that you want – both are very different. One of mine was that way and I just used a little dab of soft soap. Glad to know that you keep learning new things each time you visit – you made my day by saying that! Hello madam, This post is very rich in morality and social as well as family values. Yes, without proper discipline children lack direction and I wonder what kind of a life they would really lead or what the outcome would be of such parenting. Maybe I’m an old crank, but seeing kids running around a restaurant without disciple is a big pet peeve of mine. Parenting is very important. Assess them by seeing how they act with others, not how they act with you! Gradually, Antonio has begun parenting positively also, and also the repair of their relationship is nothing short of miraculous. Ah…I can well understand what you mean, and that’s the age when they start showing signs of doing things on their own. Glad you liked these discipline techniques, and yes, for parents with young ones it would surely come handy . But your post did ignite my past memories where papa was too strict (he is even now) and punished severely. Effective discipline techniques can help to encourage your child’s trust in you. I am the father of a boy of two – so I can personally relate with this entry and I must sincerely thank you for creating such a unique topic when I needed the info most. I know you are a wonderful parent, as I’ve mentioned this earlier and your child certainly doesn’t need any harsh methods and must be learning a lot just through your stern look if he does something wrong . But some people just can’t or can find better ways to handle things, just as your – if you don’t do XYZ . Unless parents spend quality time with their children, they will grow up without knowing the value of love. Absolutely! Thanks for stopping by and sharing your views with us. In such cases, you can get your child’s attention by calling his or her name, offer a toy to play with, or make a funny sound – anything that diverts or distracts the child’s attention. Or if a child leaves a book in school, he or she might be punished the next day for not completing the homework. So just how can you come to be a positive parent? Some kids won’t even go to their rooms or they won’t even listen to what you say and certainly need a tougher hand, if disciplining with love doesn’t work of course. They certainly need to be handled with care through such techniques. It was passed down to us but not too hard because my Mom was always there to mellow down things and put it all across in a nice, soft way. Taking away what you like and value the most is an effective discipline technique that can do wonders with kids, just as it happened in your case. Today’s post is an effort to discuss the various discipline techniques for kids that work. I have tried all these techniques but I feel each child is different and we have to change according to their response. Effective Discipline Techniques. Effective Discipline Techniques Parenting . . Especial when they get in school and hear of other kids having to toe a line at home. It will certainly accomplish more than you expect to establish the stage for problem solving together towards a resolution. From the first sensible approach to rule making and controling, it will provide valuable insights into effective discipline. However, research indicates that these are not effective discipline techniques for children and may even harm them. . If so, this post should concern each one of you , “Discipline is a symbol of caring to a child. At least those training have made me a better me…, Back here we don’t do grounding because grounding children are for the rich (so they think) . Thanks for stopping by and sharing your lovely experiences with us. Instead, you can keep away the most precious toys aside before the friends arrive, which will make him or her feel comfortable sharing the toys. #3: Effective discipline is about modeling the right behavior In addition to offering positive reinforcement, modeling appropriate behavior is equally important. Table of Contents Being a Grandparent and Parent are InterdependentWhy Should You Plan About Being a GrandparentWhat You…, Keeping calm can be one of the most challenging responsibilities of a parent. You can sign up for the free webinar by clicking the button shown below. You know why? You have done another fantastic job. In each of those scenarios, you have a VIP audience of one (your child!) If you want to know and learn more about the most effective parenting style, I’d written this post that you’d love to read. Small rewards like an ice cream treat or car ride can be more effective than big rewards, like a promise of a bicycle. Carolyn, thank you so much for such wonderful words. just warning, grounding,won’t do the trick… at least there are many who brakes the grounding rules right? Lol…I think the most common technique that works with teens is taking away their phones or not allowing the TV or the Internet – and how they’ll do all that you want them to in a jiffy . (Gasp! Chris Hondros/Getty Images. Lol…yes, sometimes you need to do that and how the kids hate it, especially when their cell phones are taken away or they are grounded for a party they wanted to go for. Missing out on a bedtime story or a car drive can make the child really behave! Some work only when they are bribed and not otherwise. Yes, I hope it does help parents who need to know about such techniques. And our relationship is still not the best today, although I have genuinely forgiven them for their mistakes. Well, thank you for saying that even though you aren’t yet a parent yourself – but glad you can relate to it. Harleena, Thanks for a great post. Like you said, it was passed down to us although leadership training, reading books and associating with people with different thought processes has helped tremendously. My very own experience with positive parenting began when my first daughter was born. My first baby is 4 and the second just arrived (1 month), You have offered a lot of meat even before getting to the real subject of the post. My kids too did that till they reached their teens and now they have their mood swings when they would do a lot on certain days, while on the others, they just won’t listen! I will surly share your blog with my future wife.. One suggestion, you should check your commentluv plugin, it is not working properly…. So, sometimes when parenting become challenging, we are often hard on ourselves as we think we are alone and need to come up with the perfect solution when our child misbehaves.

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